Brace yourself. Winter is coming.

This is quite unlike me.

More than an article, this is a list of recommended readings and a rant that may actually offend you if it suits you... and this time I'm not trying to do bad taste jokes.

Then again, this is 2020. You are considered "toxic" if you don't throw temper tantrums like a stupid baby at least 30 times a day at Twitter.

Anyway... Skyrim Platform is here and I if keep talking about it as if it was the first coming of Giga Chad Jesus, that's because that's what it actually is.

Do you really want to know why it's such a big deal?

Why such a fuss over it?

Skyrim Platform has brought to us, the unwashed masses, the power only the mythical beings that know how to make SKSE dlls in C++ had before.

... and even more than that, if you know your HTML+CSS.

So, Skyrim Platform is the democratic alternative for the people.

It's what the kettlebells[1] are to olympic bars, what the Ford T was to horse carriages, what... I've ran out of analogies because I'm an uncultured swine, but you get the idea.

IT'S A LOT OF POWER FOR YOU AND ME.

But with great power comes great fuck ups.

... or something. I was getting bored at that part about "responsibility" and shit.

So we all must prepare to receive this new power. Otherwise, this time we will break games way better and more spectacularly than before.

Prepare yourself

I may be an old, bitter asshole and quite far from being a real expert, but I know my shit and I can teach you a couple of nifty tricks for doing good use of Skyrim Platform.

You should give a good read to both these badass texts. They will prepare you quite good for a future "expert" series I'll do on Skyrim Platform[2].

  1. Notes on Programming Paradigms
  2. Javascript Allongé[3]

Why should you care about all of this, you ask?
Well if you expect to be a competent programmer[4] you should learn everything you can anyway, but if you are "just a modder" this applies doublefold... specially if you are the kind of shitty modder that does shitty scripts that give bad reputation to ALL scripts[5].

Skyrim Platform is powerful way beyond your wildest dreams, but if you are the kind of modder that "doesn't like to make scripted solutions because they are clunky and have many side effects" it will also expose your shittiness in spectacular ways we all will pay for.

Fortunately for you, being shitty at stuff is something you can get rid of with good attittude, patience and practice; but unfortunately for us, being a douche that blames others when he can't be competitive is something no one has ever been able to get ridden of.

So... which of those are you?

  1. Ah... my lovely Gyrias... ↩︎

  2. Way beyond, actually.
    I'm not so egotistical to think I can teach you more or better than them. ↩︎

  3. Don't ask me how the hell this is pronounced. I'm just a simple man that likes to break shit with his bare hands and play videogames. ↩︎

  4. And if you are an already good programmer, you will thank me for introducing you to both those guys as well. ↩︎

  5. And if you are a completelly newbie that doesn't know how to code but really wants to learn (that's the right attitude. I like you), I'm afraid I'm not the best source for that, but I promise to guide you as best as I can and try to point you to the people that can actually teach you the basics. ↩︎